First you got the whole “boy’s club” line and the whole boy’s club lineup.  But no, I say, I’m going to let that go for now, since we don’t know the entirety of the plot yet!  There was something else, but I already forgot.  Then there was flying, which in WoD thinking is all like, “FAST FLYING AND FLYING IN GENERAL IS BAD.”  Well, I like flying dammit, but I logically understand that the huge amount of gold I spent for something I value highly and that something itself are important to me, but not to designers who are thinking about the BIG PICTURE.  Shut up, emotions.  WoD is gonna be just fiiiiiiiiiiine.

But now, apparently, the WoD thinking is, “CASTING WHILE MOVING IS BAD.”

“We like casting on the move, but not as a default. Spiritwalker’s Grace is a good example of something we like; used intelligently, it can be very strong, and it feels good to use. On the other hand, Lightning Bolt always being castable on the move we’re less excited about. You don’t feel smart or skilled for using Lightning Bolt while you’re moving, it’s just sort of a free bonus that we’re not sure is really needed.”

Look, I’m not looking to feel smart or skilled when I’m running to the ranged maze path for Durumu, hitting Lightning Bolt over and over.  I’m doing it because it’s my only option.  1.) I have to move or die, 2.) one third to half of the LFR group is going to die during the first maze phase so it stands to reason WE HAVE TO GET HIM DOWN before a second occurs or we’ll all flat out die, 3.) I feel stupid just flat out running and Spiritwalker’s Grace is on cooldown, and 4.) I’M FREAKING DPS, I’M SUPPOSED TO MASH ALL THE BUTTONS BECAUSE NUMBERS.  Free bonus, you say?  Jeebus, talk to a casual player or two.  STOP ASKING ME TO MOVE EVERY SECOND WHEN I HAVE TO STAND STILL TWO SECONDS TO CAST A DAMN SPELL.

“It’s also important to note that the ability to use a cast-time spell while moving is only part of the issue. In fact, while there’s only a couple of classes that can do that, almost everyone has some number of instant cast spells they can use while moving. To really start shoring up the differences here, we need to reduce the number of instant cast spells as well. That includes healers.“

Emphasis added.  Initial thoughts:

1.) Gee, does that mean you’re going to get rid of nerf druids, since that’s a huge chunk of what they do?

2.) As a shaman, I got one instant cast – Riptide – and it’s pretty much a useless POS on its own.  SO YEAH, TAKE AWAY THOSE INSTANT CASTS because WTF is this REALLY a huge issue?  (Obviously I’m being sarcastic and not considering all possible reasoning because I’m annoyed.)

But having to balance between moving and casting makes it INTERESTING, you say!  It’s more FUN, you say!  If the deeps gotta do it, heals gotta do it too!  It’ll be great FOR EVERYBODY.  A more challenging game of yayness!

TRY HEALING TORTOS AND THEN TELL ME THAT.

That sheeyit ain’t fun – that’s annoying.  Or a real pisser when people complain about your healing numbers and there’s nothing you can do because OMFG TURTLES EVERYWHERE.  There is a freaking reason why I try not to queue for Forgotten Depths as a healer – I HATE IT.

ARrrrrgughghad;gijhda;dkghhg

saldfkjaslkfjasldkfjaslkfdj
This is how you do it.

(Quote Source)

Previously on “ROY G. BIV Transmog,” our intrepid transmog team had a difference of fashion sense.

—–

Prinnie: Next up in the transmog rainbow is the color orange!  After last month, I should probably pick another representa -

Ignitine: (interrupting) You’d better let me represent, dammit!

Prinnie: I dunno, you kinda effed up the last one.  I mean, tentacle monster?  If I let you do this, you’ll just make another tentacle monster.

Ignitine: You’ll see.  If you don’t let me, I’ll burn everything in Void Storage!!  I swear I will!

Prinnie: Yeah, like threatening me is going to get you into the contest.  Let’s be honest here – your chances are slim.

Ignitine: Honest?  Okay fine, I promise never to put tin foil in the microwave again.

(Note: not Prinnie’s microwave, which is black and hides the smoke stains better.)

Prinnie: THAT WAS YOU!?

Ignitine: It was For Science.

Prinnie: I just … I just don’t even!  ALL THE SMOKE AND DRAMA.

Ignitine: She’s distracted!  THE CONTEST ENTRY IS MINE.

“Balespider’s Manipulation” Set

Ignitine: You thought I was gonna do tentacles again, didn’t you!?  That’s right!  You thought you knew me, but you were wrong.

The “Balespider’s Manipulation” Set

Class: Warlock

H: Balespider’s Hood (normal) | S: Balespider’s Mantle (normal) | Cl: Gilded Thorium Cloak
Ch: Silk Robe of Eminent Domain | Wa: Belt of False Dignity | L: Not shown
G: Incanter’s Gloves | Wr: Not shown | B: Boots of Ethereal Manipulation

Dagger: Knife of Incision
Offhand: Juggernaut’s Power Core (LFR)

Thoughts: Fiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiireeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee Yeah, that’s about how deep my thoughts are at this exact moment.

Long did I ponder upon the weighty matter of which character would be the best use of the level 90 boost.  A rogue, perhaps?  No, I’ll never play it.  What about Pixelby, the warrior, who just happens to be conveniently stuck at level 64?  “NO,” said Cav, who insisted I had to learn warriorioring the hard way or I was no warrior at all.  A blood elf paladin maybe?  That way, I could have a paladerp of my preferred faction, and since it would be 90 to start with, that would be 90 whole levels where I wouldn’t have to listen to the emotes!  No, that wouldn’t work, I’d still emote by accident sometimes.  Like all those times I type “haha” in party chat and my character laughs out loud in the instance for no apparent reason.

In the end, I’ve decided to use the “free” level 90 thing on my little Alliance shaman.  Firstly, OMFG LAVA, and secondly, I could use a maxed shaman Alliance-side.  Lastly, another option for OLRG events wouldn’t hurt.  (I am an altoholic.  Bringing Nir week after week was beginning to make me feel the character version of cabin fever.)

BUT FIRST, I have to get Yynsia to level 60, because I love love love the idea of not having to suffer through the brutal professions slog from 1 to 600.  It’s not like I haven’t leveled profs from scratch before, after all.  I’ve done my duty!  (In truth, I’m still slowly attempting to do so on some of my level 90 alts.)  If Blizzard wants to talk about a number crunch, why don’t we talk about those 600 freaking profession skill points?*

No Helm No Pants No Service
He literally had to switch chars, mail his looms to himself, tele out to get them, and tele back in.

Bombelina’s Resto/Elemental, for which she carries around two sets of gear.  (I know the required stats are similar, but they’re not the same!) I initially didn’t pick a second spec for Yynsia due to bag space, but since she’s gotten Exalted with the basic factions (and therefore has purchased the 16 slot bags they offer) and has picked up a netherweave bag or two, that’s no longer an issue.  She started off with Resto for quick queue times.  But then I finally hit the levels when all you get via LFD is hell Blackrock, so I finally picked up Enhancement, just to do something different.

There was just one problem with this plan – all my mail agility heirlooms seemed to have gone missing. I checked every.  Single.  Alt.  I checked everybody’s Void Storage (if they’d unlocked it, that is).  I checked all the alts under level 10 (see: Moolastrasza, Aspect of the Cowflight**).  Hell, I even checked the random DKs sitting in Acherus (see: Mooalisa, Masterpiece**), just to make sure that I hadn’t sent the looms out there for safekeeping, or something.  You know.  Hoping for a miracle.

I hadn’t, of course.  They were all gone gone, kinda like how sometimes, things get broke broke.

Define “Broke”
Just work with me here.

Fortunately, all was not lost.  While item restoration never occurred to me because I am a big derpface, Bombelina and Ignitine have both been max capped on Justice for some weeks now.  Since Bombelina’s gear hasn’t changed recently, I haven’t been dropping my precious gold on reforging and enchants, and thus was able to purchase the guild heirlooms instead!  My problem then became the dire need for a pair of gloves and some dang transmog.

You see, when I picked a second server, I did so based on factors that did not at any point include the server economy.  In so doing, I landed on a server where every damn piece of low level armor, ugly or not, sells for like, 100+ gold OR LOTS MORE unless you’re lucky.  Yynsia was able to wear mail at 40, of course, but she wore her damn leather gloves until the 50s, whereupon I saw a pair of mail gloves on the AH for 75ish gold.  SOLD.  I don’t care if they’re the wrong stats – MAIL MEANS MOG.  She’s still wearing those …

I’ve interrupted leveling to go get some quest items together. Once that is taken care of, it’ll be time to finish the run to 60 and then … the magic jump to 90.

WELCOME TO THE INTERNET
This is what I imagine logging in on an insta90 is like.

I’m told LFR has been exceptionally special this week.  Gee, I wonder why?

* I don’t know why Blizzard insists that I can’t understand big numbers.  I UNDERSTAND MILLION+ CHAOS BOLT CRITS QUITE WELL, THANK YOU VERY MUCH.

My Big Numbers Are The Best Big Numbers
I UNDERSTAND THIS PERFECTLY.

** I was going to make a Tauren guild called the Mooguardians on Moon Guard, but then I got lazy.

“Fist of Exodar” Set

Class: Shaman, Hunter (requires Alliance)

H: Not shown | S: Pauldrons of the Thousand Needles | Cl: Mantle of Exodar
Ch: Tunic of the Dragon Slayer | Wa: Belt of Occult Horrors | L: Heavy Chain Leggings
G: Gut Opener Gloves | Wr: Not shown | B: Rough Bronze Boots

1h Mace: Fist of Argus
Shield: Chromie’s Mirror

Status: Finished

Thoughts:  I can’t handle being ugly while leveling.  I can’t handle being ugly while boosting to 90, or while scrabbling for decent gear, or while … well, in general.

Alas, mogging while using heirlooms is difficult for classes that change armor types at 40.  You can’t mog the heirlooms to a different armor type, of course, which means that you’re stuck until 40 in the first place and until you manage to acquire crap in the second.  I’m not gonna wait forever, though, so this is a “soon as possible” type outfit which only requires around level 50/55 to complete.

The important bits are only available to Alliance.  Not that any self-respecting orc or Forsaken would wear the Mantle of Exodar anyway.  They do the disco there, you know.

So, my guild leader wrote a book, and another one of my guildies illustrated the cover!  He’s asked me to take a look at it and write about it to raise awareness.  It’s hard to write something coherent and cohesive in the first place let alone something over a couple pages, so he deserves at least that!  Here goes.

“Song of Sinai”

Set in a dystopian future reality tormented by plague and violence, a young man seeks to understand the mystery of Big Dog from a guy named Amos, who will share the real story in exchange for amusement and a square meal.  What Amos knows (and why he knows it) may turn out to be more than John expects.

I’ll be honest – this setting is not my cup of tea, so I was turned off from the start.  I’m from a former factory town in the Rust Belt, where the death of local heavy industry hit hard and there was substantial decline as a result.  The dark pulling at the edges of life is nothing new to me, be it the body I once saw on the now-unused train tracks, or the countless houses left to rot for lack of money and/or people to live in them.  Decay and despair are familiar, yes, to a degree that when they’re laid on thick to create a city “beyond redemption,” I can’t help but roll my eyes.

It’s intended to have the stark, sometimes gritty feel of film noir (I like calling it “dystopian noir”), a setup in which women are often portrayed in ritualized ways.  So it’s probably no surprise that the biggest issue I have with the story is how the only women in it exist to be used, stared at, or even outright abused.  They are, in short, the same old plot devices, ornament and minor motivators.  I’ve produced my fair share of writing where the majority of characters are female simply because I am – it’s easiest to write from the perspective you are most familiar with, after all.  And of course women don’t have to be in everything ever.

But this reading of women just feels like the same old trope to me, trotted out to fill in the cracks of a form that’s old and not holding up well outside the “young adult” category.  It’s not the only way stereotype wins in service to the form.  Cassius the doctor is practically a demigod, and is good, kind, intelligent and educated.  He is white, while his less than perfect parents are not.  The country is pure and good in comparison to the rotted, diseased city it surrounds.

There are several plot twists you might appreciate if you’re not like me, because once I get my skeptic hat on, I can’t take it off.  I can’t divorce a piece of fiction from the greater context in which it was written (some people think I’m insane for being unable to split the two). If you’d like to check it out and challenge my view, please feel free to do so!  It’s here on Amazon, or see some excerpts at the Facebook page.

Liebster Award
A fun connection or the blog equivalent of chain emails? It’s up to you to decide, but SEND THIS TO ELEVEN NEW PEOPLE OR YOUR BEST FRIEND WILL DIE A HORRIBLE DEATH TOMORROW.  Or something.

Who is (or was) Liebster?  What is a Liebster?  I kept trying to follow the chain of links backwards to the source, but to no avail.  So while I’m totally not sure, I’m gonna take it as a compliment – Myriade was kind enough to call me one. I knew there’d be an advantage to finishing last someday in my life!  When I’m the only one left, whatever it is will fall to me eventually for lack of other options.

It looks like the intent with this thing is to create eleven questions and then tag eleven people to answer them, in essence asking someone to talk about his/herself and giving them the opportunity to do so without seeming too vain.  I mean, uh, creating new connections and introducing new blogs to others!  Yeah.

[Edit prior to publishing: looks like I got tagged by Kamalia as well!  Now I kinda feel like I gotta answer all 22 questions ...]  Read on for Way More Than You Ever Wanted to Know™ about Prinnie, games and the blog!

Myriade: Favourite race/class in WoW and why?

I THINK THE ANSWER IS OBVIOUS
Racial distribution for the current cast as of 04/01/2014.

Originally, I didn’t care for goblins.  They were weird and had freakishly long arms (the fact that I played a troll with a face freakishly similar to that of everybody else apparently didn’t concern me).  Making a goblin also required me to purchase the Cataclysm expansion, which I resisted doing until I learned I had to if I wanted to fly (which, of course, I really really did).  One day, I made a goblin death knight as a joke.  Death knights are supposed to be terrifying, right?  Not this one!  My death knight was short, pretty far from intimidating and was essentially the epitome of failure, as detailed in her profile.

Yet somehow, being a goblin grew on me.  I racechanged my troll hunter to a goblin (OMG I CAN SEE MY SHOES).  My goblin problem got worse – I began creating goblin after goblin, churning alts outta Kezan like a machine and subsequently deleting many of them around level 50.  At this point, I have seven goblins, of whom five are max leveled (none boosted).

Can’t Stop the Pure Awesome
Oh baby, don’t even try.

You see, unlike many races of Azeroth, we’re allowed to have a sense of humor.  We’re not the beautiful people, burdened with RP.  We’re not the important people, smothered in lore.  We don’t have tradition, tranquility or morals weighing us down.  So despite having had an effed up start, we just have some freaking fun being alive!  Or we have fun removing others/ourselves from such a condition.  For Science, you know.

Delving Into the Vaults

We’re far more acidic than our Alliance counterpart, the gnomes.  The gnomes were always too damn adorable and sweet for me.  Goblin activities and engineering have environmental consequences, for example, unlike the gnome areas, which may be cluttered but are usually clean.  Plus, as long as gnomes use the old models – only we goblins have kneecaps.

Myriade: Achievement/Title you’re proudest of?

My collection passed the 400 unique battlepet mark not long ago, and I landed Venus as a result.

Myriade: What’s in your bags (any character, or all of them)?

Mostly transmog gear, sorted by slot. Void Storage is busting to the nonexistent seams.  I’ve heard that Blizzard does not have databases which can handle bigger bags.  Fantasy defeated by reality, yet again!

Myriade: Favourite expansion/instance/boss fight?
Even though I wasn’t present when it played through the first time around, Wrath of the Lich King is my favorite expansion.  For me, it has the deepest emotional resonance.  (I might’ve been more terrified by Cataclysm if I’d started it when you could still be unexpectedly roasted to death by Deathwing.  But alas, he was chilling in the raid by the time I came back.)  No, it’s just your character, an endless army of the dead, and the unadmitted fear that you might wind up fighting amongst them instead of against them.

The Culling of Stratholme and Escape from Durnholde dungeon always grab my attention, even now.  You walk away, and you miss opportunities.  You could have changed this.  Why do we have to protect Arthas, but let Taretha die?  Why do we save the timelines of some, but conclude that others walk a path that is hopeless and can’t be helped?

As far as favorite boss fights go, Thok has become my favorite despite my earlier terrors.  So much justice is served when he noms on all the know-it-alls, jerks, elitists or other vocal asshats in LFR.  It is especially sweet when they tell you how to do the fight or say that your way is wrong, only to explode into parts.

MORE NOMS PLZ
One goblin is not nearly enough.

Thank you, Thok, for doing all that I cannot do.  OM NOM NOM.

Myriade: Pet peeve in WoW?
LFR IS NOT NORMAL.  HOW MANY TIMES DO I HAVE TO SAY THIS?  SHUT UP ABOUT HOW YOU DO IT IN NORMAL ALREADY.  So basically, keyboard warriors who insist on being right and having the last word in the LFR, even when it doesn’t really freaking matter.  (We’re in Mogu’shan Vaults and smashing everything before us.  Why are you complaining about the DPS?)  Or keyboard complainers who insist on whining about LFR while in it.

Myriade: What inspired your blog?
As previously mentioned, I made a goblin DK as a joke and ended up liking goblins.  As a result, I came up with a number of very bad inventions that I fancied goblins would make or care about, such as the Instabucket, Rocket Rocks, and Rocket Camels.  I decided to make a blog for this kind of foolishness.

I needed a unique URL of course, and normally I’d choose this based on the title or ideal content.  But I had no idea what to call the thing or really what I would put in it beyond my handful of innovations.  As you might have guessed, I was playing Mechalis at the time, and that’s why the URL is mechalis.wordpress.com, and not something more obvious, like omfgaccident or whatever.  It was unique and available.

You Act Like It’s My Fault
Let’s talk about projecting blame.

The name eventually turned into “That Was an Accident!” after I realized that’s really what happened to me most often.

Myriade: Favourite blog-related moment?
A couple folks linked me in their comments on a WoWInsider article about blogs.  It was almost like being internet famous or something!  I had a record number of views, unmatched since, which made looking at my stats a totally surreal experience.  THE NUMBERS.  ALL THE NUMBERS.

:D

Myriade: One thing you can’t live without?
Mocha Frappuchinos.  Step aside, or die.  You think I’m joking about this?  This is neither a joke nor a drill, and I will beat you upside the head with a glass bottle if I have to.

Myriade: Place you’d most like to visit?

Sleeping Bear Dunes
Can you guess where this is without Googling it?

Myriade: Favourite fictional character?

Miyazawa Yukino from KareKano.  I think it’s a personality thing.

Miyazawa Yukino
Says one thing, probably means another. Sometimes profoundly regrets things. Probably plotting.

Myriade: Soundtrack to your life?
I’m actually deaf in one ear and as a result often have trouble deciphering the lyrics to songs, so whatever my mythical soundtrack is, it’s probably instrumental.  Or maybe it would be the “Nom Nom Nom Nom Nom Nom” song on endless repeat, because once I get the one word in that, I got ‘em all!  I do hear the last minute or so to the War of 1812 Overture in my mind every time I go into LFR and things go wrong (which is frequently).

Kamalia: Tell me about a game or games — video or table or both! — that you are really enjoying right now.
Given time constraints and budgetary concerns, I generally play only one or two games at a time.  Currently, that would be WoW and Animal Crossing: New Leaf.  They both possess a slightly out of whack sense of humor that is in tune with my own.

Open to Interpretation

Oh No He Didn’t!
Never teaching villagers how to say “oh snap” again.

Garden Gnomes Have Rights
This is incredibly important.

Kamalia: What classes, races, or roles do you find yourself most drawn to in RPGs, whether in D&D, a single-player video game, or an MMO?
I tend to pick races that are either the average or somehow comical.  I will generally turn out to be a caster who dreams that being melee is better, or a melee who wishes she could cast spells for greater explosions.  Did I ever tell you about the time I derailed my friend’s D&D campaign by insisting that I be allowed to play a sentient tonberry hellbent on world domination?

Kamalia: When you make your first character in a new game, do you try to make a character that is in some way an avatar of your RL self, or do you make someone entirely different?
My FFXI character in days of yore shared a similar haircut to my own, but in terms of looks, I typically make something completely different.  That can’t be helped much given that I’m neither green, nor super short.

Kamalia: Describe a typical session of playing your current favorite video/computer game.
I first begin with a motivational speech.  “Dear Self: You are going to sit down and do a dungeon run for the rep bonus.  That’s one, Self.  Just one. Then after that, you are going to get up off your ass and go to the grocery store, because I swear to Gawd there is nothing left in this apartment but oatmeal and garbanzo beans!”

Next, I see that healers get those fancy satchels if they queue for LFR, so I queue for every LFR EVER.  My plan for productivity is instantly doomed.

Kamalia: What was the very first computer/video game you ever played? How old were you?
It was some sorta pinball game for the regular Nintendo.  Shortly thereafter we got the Legend of Zelda, but wouldn’t you know it, my mother got addicted to it, not me.  She got to the point where she made her own world map by drawing each “zone” on a piece of paper and then taping them all together.  (They hadn’t figured out the whole market for strategy guides yet.)  Then the game got saved over and she never touched it again.

Kamalia: Do you have more than one blog? If so, what is/are your other blog(s) about?
I have a bad blog making habit.  There’s “Dancing for Broke,” my newly created and still updated ballroom dancing blog, documenting my slow, slow attempt to learn how to shake it like a Polaroid picture (eventually with way more rhinestones and glitter).  There’s my personal blog, but that’s long and boring because I spend too much time thinking too hard in it, and it’s only updated about once a month.  So no link, because I prefer that you think of me as a fascinating, interesting person with a dynamic life!

Then there are the assorted semi-comatose blogs, like “Growing in the Shadow of Winter,” a WoW fanfic I still haven’t finished but kinda sorta hope to at some point.  “Newdood News,” my blog for Animal Crossing: New Leaf, is also mostly dead but maybe not completely so.  And then there are the really really extremely dead blogs, like my blog for my default Harvest Moon character (clocking in at one whole entry), or my Animal Crossing: Wild World blog (which is where “Prinnie” and my prinny icon come from, actually – the icon was my town’s flag).  And then there’s the transmog planning blog, which is seriously out of date and probably dead forever now that I’ve discovered Mogit.  I think that’s most of them …

Kamalia: Name three non-WoW/game-related websites that you visit frequently.
The Itty Bitty Kitty Committee, BECAUSE OMG KITTENS SO CUTE
Shorpy.com, because old photos are cool
Google, because sometimes I need to pretend I know stuff

Kamalia: What was/is your favorite animal to see at the zoo?
This may make me a bad person, but I just don’t care one way or the other for zoos and thus almost never go by myself.  If somebody wants to visit one, it’s like, ok, sure, whatever.  They wanna drag me along?  Okay, sure, whatever.  I like penguins.  I just don’t feel a need to observe them up close and personal.  Where’s the refreshment stand?  Do they have one?  Please tell me I can get some cream for this.

Kamalia: Cake or Pie? What is your favorite flavor of your preferred dessert?
CAEEEK, of any type.  Cupcakes also acceptable.  Cream cheese frosting preferred.

Kamalia: What toppings do you like on a pizza? on an ice-cream sundae?
Pepperoni for the pizza, and more ice cream for the ice cream.

Kamalia: What is your favorite writing instrument?
The good ol’ keyboard.  I periodically try to keep a physical journal and/or write Actual Letters to people, but writing things out by hand has several disadvantages.  Namely, since I’m left handed, I smear most inks everywhere, and the result doesn’t look all that romantic anymore.  My cursive is neat and clean, but not very romantic looking either.  Writing is much slower (I type around 104 WPM), and it’s hugely difficult to make edits, which I do frequently and often.  (WordPress will often stop giving me the number of revisions.)

Eleven Random Facts About Prinnie
Some versions of this Liebsterism have it, some don’t.

1. I’m missing one permanent tooth.  It wasn’t pulled – it literally never existed.
2. As a small child, I wanted to be a cheerleader.  My mother sent me to a cheerleading camp, which completely cured me of this desire and revealed an inner cynicism somewhat surprising in someone who hadn’t even achieved a double-digit age yet.
3. After that, I wanted to be a dentist.
4. As a Serious Adult doing Serious Adulting, I am neither.
5. When I was a kid, I hated writing.
6. I have kept a personal blog in one location or another for about thirteen years now.
7. I really hate the idea that all that writing will vanish when I die, because if no one knows about it, then it doesn’t exist on the internet.  I started combining and editing entries a couple years back, but then thought that self-publishing my journal in hopes that a sole copy might turn up in a couple hundred years is probably a bit weird.
8. My grasp of life is much better than it was back as a Young Prinnie and I have more sheeyit to write about as a result, but I am convinced the quality of my writing has gone down since my high school days.  Figures.
9. I’ve come up with characters, locations, plotlines, etc. for a novel that I can’t ever write because somehow, I can’t think of any conversations for them to have.
10. I once tried Irish step dancing.  I hated it.
11. Despite my goblin-ish personality, I’ve only built one rocket in my life.  It ended up on the roof of my elementary school building, which is where it presumably still lies.

My not-quite-11-of-em nominees aaaare, in no particular order:

1. … wait, everybody on my reading list has been nominated?  Craaaaaaaap.

Yak of Death
I’ll take “How Do I Get Out of This Alive” for 800, Alex.

Your questions, should you choose to accept them (and anyone can – answer in the comments if you’d like):

1. What’s one thing (other than sheer inertia) that could make you stop blogging?
2. What’s your favorite word, and why?
3. If you could choose to never ever write about a particular topic again, what would it be?
4. Does your family know about your blog?  If so, what do they think of it?
5. What’s the least realistic goal you’ve ever set for yourself?
6. Have you ever played a game so much your eyes glazed over?  What game was it?
7. Let’s say I gave you 100 cupcakes that are super delicious.  What would you do with them all?
8. Find the closest object to your right that has text on it.  Find the third word in the first sentence.  Tell us what it is, and then write a new, amazing sentence for it.  (If it’s “the,” or something like that, I may cry.)
9. Is a bad idea better than no idea at all?  Why?
10. What’s one thing you’d like to write about on your blog, but probably never will?
11. What’s the dumbest question you’ve ever been asked?

Previously on “ROY G. BIV Transmog,” our intrepid transmog team had a difference of fashion sense and a dramatic reveal of truth.

—–

Ignitine: Hi.  :D

Prinnie: Y’know, Ignitine, if I didn’t know any better, I’d say you were trolling me.  First you go tentacles, then when I’m expecting tentacles, you go normal.  Well, “normal.”  For you.

Ignitine: I’m a warlock.  :D

Prinnie: Point taken.  Have at it.

“Spelltwister’s Desire” Set

The “Spelltwister’s Desire” Set

Class: Warlock

H: Horns of the Left Hand Path | S: Felheart Shoulder Pads | Cl: Cloak of the Hardened Tortoise
Ch: Spelltwister’s Grand Robe | Wa: Sash of Mortal Desire | L: Not shown
G: Councillor’s Gloves | Wr: Not shown | B: Sandals of Ritual

Dagger: Regail’s Crackling Dagger (LFR)
Offhand: Tornado-Summoning Censer (LFR)

Thoughts: If, as a clothie, you want to avoid the obviously YELLOOOOOOW choices (Robes of the Battleguard, anyone?), then it gets a bit challenging.  Ignitine assures me this is not her “green” submission, because if she wanted to wear green, she would be wearing green, and she knows green because she is green, dammit.  No, her green submission is greener, therefore, this is the yellow one.

As a side note, all these dang sources (Icy Veins, Mogit …) keep telling me that warlocks can get the Pandaland offhand lanterns, like the Safari Lantern, but they’re wrong.  The Safari Lantern has spirit on it, which means that a purely DPS class like warlock can’t get it as a quest reward.  This makes me sad.

This is actually my favorite outfit of the year so far.

Wyrmrest Accord, where the majority of my characters live, is a high population server (to state the obvious).  We even suffered the indignity of login queues at peak hours from Christmas or so on until February!  Drenden, where Yynsia and Splattini currently reside, is about as far from a high population server as I can imagine existing.  It’s probably not actually close to the bottom at all, but it sure feels like it when you’re used to being surrounded.  (This one time I logged in, the population was listed as Medium.  Seriously!)  Drenden’s supposedly being combined with Arathor (wat? There’s a server named that?) today, so we’ll see if that changes anything.

A generally low population isn’t an issue for Splattini, who remains stuck in the 60s (I hit the BC Wall).  I level her via LFD, and I haven’t drawn up any mog sets for her yet, producing no need to purchase things off the AH.  Yynsia, though, she’s got problems.

YOU’RE CHARGING WHAT FOR THAT!?
Sigh.  Being an idiot, I thought that the AH on Drenden was going to be so much better than the one on WRA.  I mean, it’s not an RP server!  Therefore, people would pay less for the crap that’s really only good for transmog/RP!  And since there were less people, surely the prices wouldn’t be so freakishly high!  (I swear to Gawd everything on WRA jumped by a couple hundred gold when MoP went live.)

WRONG WRONG WRONG WRONG.  The market is even more jacked up.  You still have the AH addons/gurus/people with disturbingly deep pockets controlling everything, but since there are fewer of them and less stuff, it’s easier for them to literally control every last freaking item!  True, people will pay a pretty penny for platekini on a RP realm, but at least there’s a little bit of competition to bring prices down.  Kinda.

Glyph prices?  Way higher.  One of the reasons I ditched leatherworking/skinning to take up herbing/inscription was the Allianceside glyph market – when you’re not in Mists level content, you simply don’t make enough via quests/dungeon runs to buy the useful ones.  (The other reason would be the simple fact that skinning makes me horribly OC.  I canNOT move on until all the mobs on the ground have been skinned.  Otherwise, I’M LEAVING PROFIT JUST LYING THERE.  This is enormously problematic in places like Blackrock Spire or Sunken Temple.)  I haven’t even LOOKED at enchants/gems yet.  I’m scared.  If a Jade Spirit enchant is like, 4k on WRA … I … I can’t do it.  I can’t.  I need somebody to hold my hand.

OMG TREASURE MAYBE?
Many boosted 90s are, shall we say, still figuring out their class – myself included.  The sad truth is that I’m pretty incompetent at Enhancement (super dinky offhand weapon doesn’t help), since I usually run Yynsia as Resto (and Bombelina’s geared enough to heal while in Elemental).  As a result, there are a lot of chests on the Isle with potential tokens in them on the that I just can’t get to.  I require other people to kill the mean, nasty mobs around them first!

WELL NOW WHAT
I can’t kill them fast enough!

On WRA, this usually doesn’t take very long.  (If somebody doesn’t intentionally kill said mob, they pull it while running, which means I get a nice window of opportunity to loot and run.)  On Drenden?  Well, yeah.  I’m not waiting for that to happen!  It’s not that I don’t see people at all.  It’s just that I haven’t seen anything like peak times on WRA, where pretty much everything is already tagged, dead, or respawning.

RARE! KILL IT KILL IT! OR NOT, I GUESS.
What with Yynsia’s gear and my poor understanding of Enhancement, somebody else has to hit the rare first because there is no effing way she is surviving.  Problem is, there aren’t a whole lot of people who will do that.  On WRA, strength in numbers counts for something.  Players that might otherwise not touch a mob first get impatient and do, knowing that enough help will arrive in time to save them.  Drenden?  Well, I just have to wait longer for that moment.

It is incredibly mind-boggling to me to see Evermaw just … happily swimming around the Isle, all chill and stuff.  I can follow him around, thanks to Water Walking.  I imagine him filtering all the Pandarian plankton with a whaleshark smile, safe in knowing that he’s not going to get chased down and brutally murdered anytime soon.

AWWW YEAH

On this day of days two whole freaking years and a day ago, “That Was an Accident!” came into being with a post about the Amazing Instabucket – just add water, and bam, you got a bucket!  It holds water like nothing else!  After a few more inventions, I switched to screenshots, and then eventually admitted I had a transmog problem from which I could not recover.  I documented my WoW life alongside the symptoms of this disease.  (I have completed 70 sets.  There is no cure.)

Now, the blog is sitting pretty at approximately 43k views.  It’s a hair shy of 2k comments (half of which are me – I’m my own top commenter), and has approximately 80 followers.  These are tiny numbers compared to other blogs out there, but I’ll be darned if they aren’t the biggest numbers I’ve ever seen.  Because of the blog name and the fact that I once posted about dancing on Varian Wrynn’s head as a bear, I get a lot of searchers looking for accidents that occurred at parties at which there just so happened to be a dancing (and probably angry) bear. 173 people have found this blog by looking for “chicken.”  And somebody once searched for “suggestions for improving attendance at happy hour social events,” but I’m gonna have defer to the OLRG on that one.

Oddly, the top post/page is the About page, which clocks in at a grand total of not quite fifty words.

Top Five Posts OF ALL FREAKING TIEM are …
(and of course I haven’t adjusted for the length time it’s been published or anything)

1. “Maybe I should just call this a transmog blog? “Royal Apothecary” Set (08/07/12)
There have to be some RPers out there that I drew in with the name of the mog set, because the post is not that entertaining.  It has zero comments to read, is not an example of my snappiest writing and is neither my best nor fanciest mog.  BUT HEY APOTHECARY

2. Can’t Stop the Transmog (07/30/2012)
My theory with the popularity of this post: innocent RPers, once again snared in my net, since I talk about not sitting on the throne in Silvermoon.  Otherwise, it makes no sense.  All I do is complain about Cav (formerly Caliverne) calling my mage “old lady.”

3. Vote Kicking in LFD (02/20/2013)
A post that talks about actual issues within WoW?  Unheard of!  I remember being amaaaaaaaaaazed by the number of people who had something to say.  It was one of a handful of times I got voluntarily linked by a podcast thinger that I had zero affiliation or bribery whatsoever with, and I felt so amazingly RELEVANT.

4. Project Platekini Part 1: “Dark Embrace” Set (02/25/2013)
SURPRISE, platekini is popular.  It’s also a good looking, relatively low level set.

5. The Forgotten Depths of OH MY GOD SNAILS (03/23/2013)
Even now, over a year later, the snails take down more players than the bosses of the first ToT wing combined!  (I just made that up, but it’s probably true.)  A sha-touched snail should also be in the Brawler’s Guild if there one isn’t already.

The least favorite post OF ALL TIEM (that I haven’t deleted out of regret) is one that sits at 2 views.  I’m not calling it out.  It knows who it is.

You know what they call THIS?

STATUS MOUNT BABY
Now to add some chrome. Maybe neon too …

They call this a STATUS MOUNT.  Yeah, that’s right.  It may not be as statusy as Invincible, but you can’t see that one anyway.  (p.s., can somebody explain to me why I can ride some flying mounts everywhere, even in instances – say, the Sky Golem – but others won’t let me do the same?  They’re all “flying” mounts to me, so I don’t get the distinction.)

You know what they call THIS?

Crazed Tribal Tiki Torch Bikini Babe
If you’re a guy, you actually expose your moobs. GASP.

A FREAKING DISASTER!  Also, I think the shoulder totems/torches/cannons talk when I cast.  I have enough voices to start with, so I really don’t know how I feel about adding two more to the choir.  I guess it would be appropriate if one talking tiki cannon represented Good Prinnie.  Good Prinnie is the Prinnie known for her non-destructive works, like the times when I hit Ghost Wolf before the invis potion button thereby avoiding aggro for the greater good, or when I remembered to heal the tank keep the tank alive when the actual healer was getting mana, thereby saving time for the greater good.  The other talking tiki cannon would represent Derp Prinnie.  Derp Prinnie runs around in circles in the Siege of Niuzao, trailing all the adds everywhere while helpfully screaming “OGOD ALL THE ADDS” in Vent.  In my defense, I thought we were gonna restart the attempt (we didn’t).

Completing all Challenge mode dungeons at the bronze level will net you “the Undaunted” title. This is a very handy dandy title that serves to prove that you will NOT be stopped by the whim of RNG or even the pain of frequent, repeat death.  (YES.  YOU HEAR THAT!?  I AM NOT DAUNTED BY YOU, RNG!)  You can get the mount for all silver runs.  The transmog set is only available to those souls who have completed all the Challenge mode dungeons at a gold level (a.k.a., within a narrow, often annoyingly short time limit).

You gotta be READY for Challenge modes.  CMs are all like, “you think you know these dungeons, eh?  Feel pretty comfy in your tier gear?  Used to that legendary DPS cloak proc that tentacles all the adds dead?”  A CM dungeon will then laugh its ass off and tear you a new one while you sob about your favorite set bonus that no longer counts, or the fact that your invis pot didn’t last long enough for you to actually jump over the edge and engage Gekkan without also engaging sixteen bazillion adds.  Challenge modes like to see you suffer.  A CM dungeon will take one look at that fancy food you just ate and then kill you dead so you have to eat something else all over again.

The level of difficulty meant that Bombelina was the only one who could do Challenge modes, relegating every other alt to support staff status.  As a result, other characters with CM mog sets I liked better found themselves playing second fiddle despite mog usually being my top priority.  Ailabeth got stuck serving time in a damp cave out in Un’goro, looking for stupid mushrooms.  On the plus side, she discovered she could pass the time by one-shotting the gorillas with Shadow Word: Pain.  She eventually emptied the entire place.  Think about it, man -  Bombelina, Ailabeth and an entire species were all devastated by Challenge modes!

Most of My Screenshots Look Like This
Because derp

My partners in crime in this endeavor were Goa, Kash, Shanthi and Shudal.  They’re all on the same server and in the same guild, which is good, because that means they’re all freaking heroic raiders (a.k.a., this kinda stuff doesn’t really phase them because lol it’s just timing).  Basically, it was all thanks to them that this went over well.  I kinda set the low bar in terms of overall performance.  Since gear is scaled down, it’s obviously a skill thing, but I shall pretend otherwise.  Seeking to deflect attention from my inadequacies, I totally say it’s because I was obviously busy dropping the combustostunulator totem and running away, or bringing out one of my elementals and running away, or trying to put down Healing Stream and running away … multitasking.  Yeah.

If I’m Alive Enough To Yell, I’m Fine
It’s IMPORTANT to state how I feel.

My reactions to each dungeon were somewhat varied, depending on how painful the experience was.

Scarlet Halls
I don’t even remember this one anymore, which means it wasn’t that traumatic.

Mogu’shan Palace
Ffffffffff invis potions jeebus cripes get in the car it’s a lot of saurok.

Scholomance
Even though I’ve seen that ice wall a million times and know it’s coming, it turns out that ice walls can still freak me out bad.

Siege of Niuzao
THERE ARE ADDS EVERYWHERE THERE IS NOTHING THAT ISN’T AN ADD THAT ISN’T BAD.

Gate of the Setting Sun
Bombelina doesn’t like to be on the receiving end of multiple bombs.

Temple of the Jade Serpent
I still can’t run in nice, even circles.  I do more of an oval.  Or this kinda wobbly sort of shape …

Shado-Pan Monastery
Pandas are pushovers.

Stormstout Brewery
If I ever see another hozen, it’ll be too soon (and it’s gonna be a dead hozen).

Scarlet Monastery
So, elemental shamans get Solar Beam when a druid uses Symbiosis on them.  98% of the time, this is entirely regrettable and utterly pointless.  BUT HOLY CRAP, IS IT USEFUL HERE OR WHAT!

It’ll probably be a cold day in hell before you see me in another Challenge Mode dungeon.

WTF Is He On?
Literally and figuratively

Soon after completing normal Siege, the guild moved onto the heroic version.  You might recall I spent some time fretting about this, but I ultimately concluded that I just wasn’t very interested in heroic raiding.  Yeah, I’d like the powerful gear and of course want to collect ALL THE COLORS of everything for transmog’s sake, but there’s “challenge,” as far as I’m concerned, and then there’s “suffering so much you learn to enjoy the pain.”  I did recently volunteer to jump off a cliff if it would get me a Garrosh kill, which actually worked!  (Can we talk the Dark Shaman transmog set now?  Because I will totally throw myself off a cliff into the sea onto a bunch of sharp pointy rocks for that … but preferably in Flex mode.  I got my limits.)

Bombelina, Liberator of Moar Gold
Curse you, RNG. CURSE YOUUUUUUU.

Yeah, I rolled, got gold, and then I died because of a dot or something, or possibly sheer frustration at FINALLY GETTING HIM DAED TIME TO USE PRECIOUS TOKENS and of course, gold.  (Or it could’ve just been overwhelming shock.)  So what’s a girl to do now that Garrosh has had his face punched in, Arf the Kor’kron War Wolf the Destroyer of Worlds has been adopted and I’ve conclusively proven that RNG doesn’t care how long you’ve waited for this moment?  GET MORE LEGENDARY CLOAKS, OBVIOUSLY.

The two closest contenders are Thermalix and Ignitine.  Thermalix is farther ahead in the quest series, partially because the end goal feels less distant.  She is currently stuck collecting Titan Runestones.  Ignitine’s got capped rep as well, but because she hit 90 so late, she’s still scrabbling for twenty Secrets of the Empire.  Thermalix and Ignitine are now both collecting Titan Runestones.  Niremere is trailing far, far behind at halfway through Honored with Wrathiewathie, and I don’t even remember where everybody else is (which means they’re probably all still collecting sigils).

I C WAT U DID THAR
I feel it too. IN MY SOUL.

Most people conclude that I am in dire need of an intervention when they hear that I’m working towards more legendary cloaks.  But I think I am still sane, since it’s not like I’m actually working real hard towards this goal or anything.  It’s more like, “oh gee, I guess I could transmute some trillium,” or, “well, it’s not like I’m doing anything else, so I could run ToT and see if any Secrets drop.”

Are You Saying Carnage is a Problem?
Because I’m not seein’ it.

But then again, I did just stay up until like two a.m. in the morning, grinding Ignitine’s Black Prince rep from the beginning of Revered to capped.  It was just so easy as a Destro lock, I couldn’t help myself!  I simply parked Ignitine and her Voidlord next to a spot where a bunch of statues spawned on a relatively quick basis (and some dumb ass Mogu walked by regularly), and they Killed Everything That Moved.  Sometimes all at once, even.  Was I not paying attention to what I was doing, and therefore got hit by four or five mobs that the Voidlord hadn’t aggroed yet?  Oh, I got a healthstone for that.  Healthstone on cooldown?  Oh, I got embers, I’m good.  Am I getting knocked back, interrupting my Chaos Bolt casts?  An eye for an eye and all that jazz, so I’ll just stun them … ALL AT ONCE. TREMBLE, STATUES, AS YOUR PATHETIC MAGIC BETRAAAAAAYS Y …

(Note to self: sure, you’ve broken ICC a couple times, but it seems clear that ICC has broken you.)

Even though Thermalix is the second character I ever created, I suspect that Ignitine’s got better long term chances of actually getting the cloak.  This is partially because Ignitine now outgears Thermalix (when the hell did that happen) by ten points.  It’s partially because the demons, while sometimes dumb, somehow seem to be less dumb than hunter pets.  (FOR THE LOVE OF DEEPS, STOP DESUMMONING YOURSELVES ON THE IMMERSEUS FIGHT.)

More importantly, Ignitine can heal herself with a renewable resource – embers.  (Healthstones don’t hurt, either, nor does making your demon shield you with its very health …)  Poor Therm has one pot per fight and any bandages she can get on herself, plus her spirit beast’s incredibly dinky heal.  Ignitine breezed through the part where you have to reactivate the Thunder Forge and make the spear to throw at Nalak, as did Bombelina before her.  Therm?  Nope.  I actually had to redo it (gasp), and I specifically planned ahead for the second attempt by running heroic dungeons until I got into a party with a warlock.  I stole a Healthstone and kept it for my own nefarious purposes.  Potion + bandage + spirit beast’s dinky heal + lockcookie = SUCCESS.

The other major factor for Ignitine’s eventual supremacy is the fact that I can manage 300k mana much better than I do 100 focus.  If I have focus, I must use Arcane Shot.  It’s some sort of compulsion where I must select the Thrill of the Hunt talent, and I must.  Press.  The.  Flashing.  Button.  I will Arcane Shot dump every bit of focus as fast as I possibly can until the button stops flashing.  But then Kill Command will come off cooldown and I end up not having enough focus!  That forces me to take a long time using Cobra Shot to restore focus.  Being me and liking flashy buttons, this situation occurs quite often and I always wind up using Cobra Shot more than once whether I need to or not because of my mashing technique.  Long story short: as a hunter, efficiency is not my #1 virtue.

For the Love of Gawd
RUN FOR IT

Throwing the spear at Nalak was fun, even though I’ve done it before.  I think it’s because there’s an element of totally ridiculous risk, but it’s not something utterly insurmountable – it can easily be defeated if I guilt people ask for help.

Greater Purpose
It counts as moral support.

Speaking of ogodwtf:

All The Awesome
Best glyph, or best glyph? You decide

You’d think that I would have remembered just how bad I suck at rogue-ing.  I’d made it to level 80, after all, stubbornly stabbing things as best I could while other people actually did the killing DPS.  It sucked.  I sucked.  I was worse at rogue than I was at ret paladerping!

Forsaken Atmosphere
Come for the culture, stay forever.

But no.  I did not remember.

Since we beat the Challenge modes, Kash’s guild has the fancy cute pet thing that, alas, you have to be Revered to acquire.  As I am not able to finance a transfer at this point in time, I decided I’d just level up another alt – not like altoholism is a new problem for me or anything.  I had a full set of leather agility looms no longer in use, as well as one agility heirloom sword thanks to leveling a monk.  So I got an heirloom dagger, went Combat rogue, and have since regretted this choice utterly.

It’s like, DUH, self, DUH.  Didn’t you see this coming?  If I can’t be bothered keep up that Inquisition thing for ret paladerping, it stands to reason I am certainly not going to want to keep up Slice and Dice for rogue.  Especially not when building up combo points takes too @#$%king long to be useful in the first place!  I can generally get up to two or three of them if I can Ambush, which is so not guaranteed, and if my fellow party members are equally incompetent so the mob lives long enough.

Let’s assume I can Ambush, which means I succeeded in 1.) getting into Stealth in the first place, which is sometimes impossible because CHAIN PULLING, and 2.) getting behind the mob before it dies thanks to positional requirements.  P.S., the latter is only possible when the tank is a nice PvE person and not a PvPer, since PvPers continually whirl mobs around like some sort of paranoid drug addict on a high.  THIS IS NOT THE LUMBER MILL HERE, PEOPLE.  The next problem is that Ambush costs 60 energy, but I only have 100 energy max.  So let’s say the next thing I want to do is Revealing Strike.  Since Revealing Strike is only 40 energy, I can do two things in a row oh boy howdy!  But then I’m at absolutely zero energy and have to wait forever to do ANYTHING other than autoattack.  Oh, so Revealing Strike gives my Sinister Strikes a chance to generate an extra combo point?  Well, that’s just freaking SWELL, because Sinister Strike is a grand total of 50 energy – HALF MY ENTIRE ENERGY POOL.  You know how often I get to do that on a regular mob?  Like never.  I can use it maybe two or three times on a boss if the other DPS suck just as bad or worse than I do!

So you know what a low level rogue does?  ALMOST NOTHING.  Yeah, this is real fun!

And OoooOoOOooOo Combat rogues get Blade Flurry!  Sounds useful for low level dungeons, since people pull mobs en masse!  ONLY IT ISN’T USEFUL AT ALL, because it reduces your energy regen by 20%, which at this point is so laughably painful I just can’t even.

NO! NO! NO!

I was trying to get some levels in via LFD, since higher level questing gives you more gold – which I will need to purchase the pet -  but yeah, screw that.  I’m going to just quest.  Actually, I may just make another class.  Or maybe I should leave this rogue alive as a testament to how I can’t rogue – SO I REMEMBER.

I may not remember real well how to hunter, but there I was on Thermalix anyway, trying to drag people into LFR with me.  Just two more Runestones, folks, seriously, all I need is a mere two more!  We’ll definitely get them on the first two bosses, and then you can drop!  It’ll be fiiiiiiine.  Because my troubled relationship with RNG is well known, however, I pretty much only convinced Rep to come along.  I guess Rep still likes me even though my bad luck is sometimes contagious.

We both queued up as DPS and after a false start when a Warbringer tempted me (I, uh … well, I can’t hunter well enough right now to kill one alone), I started to mine to pass the time.  Mining is safer, after all, and it fills the lengthy DPS queue.  But then, this person named Navispammer whispered me.

Navi!
HEY. LISTEN!

Wait, not that one.  This one.

Navi!
This Navi has a much larger vocabulary.

It seemed that I was being … NAVISPAMMED.

Navispammed!

Of course, that’s exactly when the queue finally popped, since that’s just how these things work.  Well, screw THAT.  To Thunder Bluff!  (In the spirit of things, I dragged Rep out there too.)  After a bit of flying around, I finally managed to locate Navi.  (Reason #3542 for flying: finding people.)  Fortunately, Therm’s active pet matched her mog on this momentous occasion.  There were many screenshots.  AND THEN Navi was kind enough to give me a Soul of the Aspects!

Dance Tiem!
The wide plains of Mulgore were clearly meant for going wild.

Thank you so much, Navi!

Naming Them is the Hardest Part
The leveling, I can handle. Naming? Now THAT is a challenge.

“Stupid Belt” Set
I mean, uh, “Celestial Naturalist” Set

“Celestial Naturalist” Set

Class: Shaman

H: Faceguard of Celestial Harmony (LFR) | S: Skyshatter Mantle | Cl: Not shown
Ch: Vicious Gladiator’s Ringmail Armor | Wa: Naturalist’s Preserving Cinch | L: Vicious Gladiator’s Ringmail Leggings
G: Gallywix Laborer’s Gloves | Wr: Not shown | B: Amberpine Greaves

Dagger: Starshard Edge
Shield: Ice Layered Barrier

Thoughts: BANDANAHAT.  It combines the coolness of a bandana with the usefulness of a hat!  I get to be mysterious and shield myself from the sun at the same time.

Now, this could be proof of either insanity or long-term planning, but I’ve had those freaking blue mail gloves FOREVER.  You think I’m kidding?  Well, you can only get them from the goblin starting zone … and I just now found a use for ‘em at level 90.  You know what else could be proof of insanity or long-term planning?  I started this set in like, November or December.  Supremus didn’t drop the belt until the end of April.  Mother trucker!

This was originally going to be my healing set, because hey, water spells and blue seem to go together, right? UNFORTUNATELY, I’ve been getting more and more OC about the legendary cloak wings working with/against a mog.  My healing wings are red and gold, not watery whatsoever, (dammit), while my DPS wings are tentacle-y and green, which go better.

Previously on “ROY G. BIV Transmog,” our intrepid transmog team had a difference of fashion sense and a dramatic reveal of truth, and a moment in which Prinnie rolled over and admitted Warlock Logic is the Best Logic.

—–

Prinnie: I’m waiting for the other shoe to drop here, you know.

Ignitine: But I’m wearing both of them.

Prinnie: That’s not what I mean!  I’m just sayin’, it looks like you’re plotting something, and I just don’t think it’s going to end well for anyone.

Ignitine: My plots always end well for me, though.

Prinnie: Where’s Esplodine?  She’s a fashionista!  I should get her to do this month’s contest. It would be safer.

Ignitine: Oh, I sent her a bunch of greens and told her to put them on the AH for great profit.  She doesn’t use any sort of AH addon, so we won’t be seeing her for awhile.

Sweet, Sweet Profits
Don’t wanna wake up ’til it’s real.

Prinnie: Wow, well done.

Ignitine: Damn straight!

“Swamplight Conjurer” Set

The “Swamplight Conjurer” Set

Class: Warlock

H: Savage Gladiator’s Felweave Cowl | S: Savage Gladiator’s Felweave Amice | Cl: Swamplight Cloak
Ch: Gladiator’s Dreadweave Robe | Wa: Glyph-Lined Sash | L: Not shown
G: Gladiator’s Dreadweave Gloves | Wr: Not shown | B: Conjurer’s Shoes

Dagger: Midnight Sun
Offhand: Festering Primordial Globule (LFR)

Thoughts: So here’s a goblin gone green(er).  This is Ignitine’s subtle set.  Warlocks get a lot of nuclear snot green options for obvious reasons …

… aaaaand now that I’ve thought of “fel green” as nuclear snot green, I can’t unsee this mental picture I have of green fire actually being gobs of irradiated mucus, sneeze-hurled from the sky by some giant, invisible nose.  If you can’t shake the image now either, you’re welcome.

In other news, Ignitine made a new friend in Siege:

Gooey Sha-ling
One finally agreed to go home with the goblins.

Previously on “ROY G. BIV Transmog,” our intrepid transmog team had a difference of fashion sense, a dramatic reveal of truth, and a scene in which Prinnie rolled over and admitted Warlock Logic is the Best Logic.  Later, Prinnie learned that greedn is good.

Ignitine: I want you to picture this brick wall.  It’s a very nice brick wall, very tall and thick.  Nice, solid bricks, you know, not falling apart or anything.  Now, imagine your noggin, and the brain sloshing about in it.  You may have more sloshing happening than I do.  Next, I want you to picture your skull bashing into the wall repeatedly at high speeds, all this splashing and smashing, until you either break through the wall or have a total bloody meltdown.  THAT, my friend, is how I approach things.

Prinnie: This explains so much about you.  Let’s get this month’s outfit over with, yes?

Ignitine: I’m glad you’re starting to see things my way.

“Hateful Sha” Set

Prinnie: Oh Gawd help us all, she’s gone back to normal.

Ignitine: OM NOM NOM, baby!

The “Hateful Sha” Set, or the “Om Nom Nom” Set

Class: Warlock

H: Sha-Skin Hood | S: Sha-Skin Shoulders | Cl: Platinum Mesh Cloak
Ch: Hateful Gladiator’s Felweave Raiment | Wa: Sash of the Wizened Wyrm | L: Not shown
G: Mystic’s Gloves | Wr: Not shown | B: Boots of Ethereal Manipulation

Dagger: Midnight Sun
Offhand: Talisman of Kalecgos

Thoughts: Om nom nom!

The moment I first saw this hat, I knew it was a hat responsible for the death of many things – hopes, dreams, and possibly critters.  Yes, this hat was clearly a killer, and I had to have it.  It worked out (for mostly everyone), though – Wrathie-poo wants the Chimaera of Fear from the Sha of Fear?  Yeah sure, I guess I can go grab it for him, ’cause I’m gonna be running Terrace for the hat.

Speaking of the legendary questline, Ignitine finally got her cloak at the end of last month:

Ignitine Cloak Get
The wings work for warlocks.

Since this contest requires you mog all visible slots, it meant she had to save a cloak for mogging purposes.

Previously on “ROY G. BIV Transmog,” our intrepid transmog team had a difference of fashion sense, a dramatic reveal of truth, and a scene in which Prinnie rolled over and admitted Warlock Logic is the Best Logic.  Later, Prinnie learned that greedn is good, and that really, warlocks never change – pretty much ever.

Ignitine: So, this is the last one.  Are we gonna have to have a conversation here?  You know, about my motivations or something?  The composition of my choices?  The fact that I dress LIEK WARLOCK instead of taking the competition into account?

Prinnie: No, I really think it’s better if we don’t.  At this point, reality’s settled in.  Surreality?  Something.

Ignitine: I just didn’t wanna waste your time, since I’m gonna go all out.  After all, it’s easier to ask for forgiveness than it is to ask for permission!  If I wanted to, that is.

Prinnie: I’m not sure I’m ready.  Let me climb under my desk real quick.

“Broken Nightmares” Set

Prinnie: … what was that sound I just heard?  Was that my soul breaking?

Ignitine: Oh, that?  Yeah, that’s normal.  You get used to it.

The “Broken Nightmares” Set

Class: Warlock

H: Hood of the Horned Nightmare (LFR) | S: Mantle of the Horned Nightmare (LFR) | Cl: Cloak of Seething Hatred
Ch: Bloodsoul Raiment | Wa: Belt of the Falling Rain | L: Not shown
G: Gloves of Broken Fingers | Wr: Not shown | B: Consortium Boots

Dagger: Blade of the Unmaker
Offhand: Mystifying Charm

Thoughts: And thus, the “ROY G. BIV Transmog” series concludes with the biggest, freakiest hat Ignitine could find.  Sure, it’s not the most violet-y, purple-y hat out there, but the violet accents it has TOTALLY COUNT.  Well, they count enough for a certain warlock with highly flexible standards.

I’m sure you’ve noticed that I’ve been somewhat absent from blogging and the game in general.  I haven’t had as much time to play recently, and as a result, this rendition of the outfit isn’t exactly what I envisioned.  It’s not the exact cape or off-hand I wanted, but it’ll have to do.  I dunno about you, but what with the new expac now in beta and all, most time spent in Azeroth seems like a waiting game occupied mostly by the “MOAR CLOAKS” Project.  What’re you in here for?  Runestones.  I need them all.  What’re you in here for?  Secrets.  Do Secrets drop in here?  What’re you in here for?  Do these bosses drop Runestones?  What’re you in here for?  Don’t ask.  Just don’t ask.

After learning that flying is bad, casting while moving is bad, and manly orcs boy’s trip is yay great woooo, I stopped looking at WoD updates.  I hit my max capacity for caring and simply couldn’t muster up any more cares for the subject.  Garrisons?  Fine, whatever.  New models?  Okay, that’s nice, I guess, since it’d be swell if Niremere could actually have facial expressions.  Just let me know when they’re done, because I can’t make myself care enough to nitpick during development, okay?  I get this feeling that WoD is something that is just going to happen to me, like I’ll not be paying attention during a fight and then BAM!  EXPANSION HAS HIT YOU FOR 9999 PHYSICAL DAMAGE! (9998 OVERKILL!)  My other suspicion is that my computer will take one look at the new fancy crap and beg for new settings far under the bare minimum that the game is currently set to.

But I watched the fancy cinematic because why not, I guess, sure.  I got two and a half thoughts about it.

Magnificent Hair
Seriously, just look at it. It’s freaking magnificent.

1.) Wow, that guy Grommash has amazing hair.  Look at how smooth, straight and luxuriant it is!  I bet he uses some kinda hair dryer and styling mousse to get it so nice.  Takes about a half hour in the mornings or before battle, maybe.

2.) Wow, is it just me, or does Garrosh’s chin get bigger each time he makes an appearance?
2a.) That is a vicious 5 o’clock shadow.  Good Gawd, Garrosh, going back in time and changing sheeyit is absolutely no excuse to let your personal grooming go!

“Mountain Tracker” Set

“Mountain Tracker” Set

Class: Hunter (Alliance required for teeny tiny cape)

H: Ironspine Helm | S: Mantle of the Tireless Tracker | Cl: Incorruptable Shawl
Ch: Undergrowth Stalker Chestpiece | Wa: Crafted Dreadful Gladiator’s Links of Accuracy | L: Leggings of Twisted Vines
G: Mountain Gauntlets | Wr: Not shown | B: Atoll Treaders

Bow: Dagryn’s Discarded Longbow (LFR)

Thoughts: Yeah, I know, that should be “Incorruptible,” but it isn’t.  Look it up on Wowhead, you’ll see!

1.) In an ideal transmog world, I would have preferred the blue version of the bow, but that’s from heroic Galakras.  Let’s be real here – there is no bleeping freaking way that’s happening.  I’ll settle for a green bow over “being beaten to a pulp, falling off towers and getting set on fire all at once.”

2.) Speaking of preferences: I always like shorter capes on draenei, mostly because cape + tail = weird.  Long capes should not stick out the way they do!  I wonder if they’re going to be fixing that?

3.) By the time I decided I wanted to use this particular color/model of boots, I had foolishly tossed them in the form of an early quest reward.  I was thus forced to go through a majority of Vashj’ir to get this pair.  D’oh!

4.) Daschela’s progress on the legendary cape is looking up.  I’d originally intended to get Niremere her cloak first, but she’s totally, utterly stuck at Chi-ji’s healing challenge.  Now, Dasch has a great chance of getting her cloak before Nir does simply because I find it a lot easier to shoot blobs and Wrathiepoo from a distance.  I’d thought the healing challenge would be no problem for Nir whatsoever (Bombelina breezed through it like whoa), but apparently, while I’m decent with shaman-style healing, I’m plain horrific at paladin-style (especially when it comes to periods of high damage).  The other major issue Nir faces is Wrathion doing crap DPS to the image of his father (unlike the DPS he does to me in the ranged trial), since that means I must assist him in order to not die of sheer boredom go OOM.  Bombelina, that was easy, all like, “HEALING RAIN!  HEALING STREAM TOTEM!  NOW FLAME SHOCK!  LAVA!  LIGHTNING!  ELEMENTALS GO!”  But poor Niremere?  She’s stuck with “DENOUNCE!  DENOUNCE!  DENOU…SHEEYIT!  WTF!?  WHERE DID HIS HEALTH GO!? CRAP THIS CASTING IS TAKING TOO LONG CRAP CRAP CRAP IT RESET WTF GAWD I HATE YOU WRATHION!”